How We Accepted Christ – What Being a Christian Means to Us

     Kim and I got married on September 12, 1981.  As of this writing, we’ve spent 37 years together.  I am amazed at what our marriage has become and had no idea it could be this good.  But it didn’t start out like it is now. Our marriage is the way it is because we have each made a journey to God and then with God, together.  What has shaped our journey most is our relationship with God. 

The Consideration of God

     When I was 17, I dated a girl who was a Christian.  I was not brought up in a Christian home, but I knew she had something in her life that I wanted in mine.  At the time, I just did not know what that was. I started going to church and one Sunday, the pastor told the story of a loving God and that our sin had separated us from Him.  I used to think that God could do anything, but I learned that day that there is something God cannot do.  God cannot look upon sin. It is totally against His nature. God is holy, so holy that the Bible says He is holy, holy, holy.  

      I learned that our sinfulness had separated us from God and how we could do nothing to mend this relationship.  God gave the people in the Old Testament sacrificial system for a time, but as Hebrews chapter 10 says, the blood of bulls and goats was never meant to take away the sins of man.  It was just an annual reminder of their sin. It was a substitute until the ultimate sacrifice came along – Christ, God’s Son is the only real answer to our sin. I listened as the pastor explained that if we confess with our mouth and believe in our heart that Jesus has died for our sin and was raised from the dead, that we could be saved.  

The Acceptance of God

     I waited for the church to empty then went up front and talked with the pastor.  I told him that I wanted this thing he had been preaching about. He asked if I wanted to know Christ personally and ask Him to forgive my sins and then live my life for Him, and  I said yes, I believed so. It was a hot day and the church had no air conditioning, so we went and sat on the front steps where he explained what a relationship with Christ meant.  He then asked if I would like to pray and ask Christ to forgive my sins and come into my life. Once again, I said yes. We bowed our heads to pray and it was quiet… and it was quiet… and it was quiet.  Finally, I looked up and told the pastor that I didn’t know how to pray. He asked if I would like to have him pray and I could repeat the prayer after him. I said yes. The prayer went something like this. “God, I believe that Christ died for my sins.  I repent and ask that through the blood of Christ, You would forgive my sins. Help me to follow You, God, throughout my life. Teach me and show me Your ways.”  

     That is how I made a decision for Christ.  I remember getting into my truck and knowing that my life had changed.  I recently looked at the diary that I kept at the time. I recorded the day I made the decision and in the following days, I wrote that I knew something was different.  God’s Spirit had taken up residence within me and was going to take my life down many paths to refine me and make me more than I could imagine.

     Kim here.  I am 5 years younger than Mitch but I made my decision to follow Christ the same year Mitch did, at age 12, after hearing a similar message explaining that Christ had died for my sins and that He wanted to forgive my sins and be the Lord of my life at a local crusade.  This is definitely the best decision I have ever made! I am so grateful to have Him walking with me each day of my life! Mitch and I got married when we were 19 and 24 and started down this path called marriage. It was a pretty rocky path until both of us decided to get serious about our commitment to Christ.  

     Mitch and I started this marriage ministry because of the difference that growing in our relationship with Christ made in our marriage compared to when we were trying to do it on our own.  It is our desire to point people to Christ and share the difference that He has made in our lives, with the hope that others will turn to Christ and allow Him to transform their lives also.  Whatever your life struggles may be, whether in your marriage or something else, Jesus is the answer and He wants to walk with you every day for the rest of your life no matter what you are going through. 

The Commitment to God

      The day I made my commitment to Christ was not the high point of my salvation.  The high point is constantly being made each day – accepting Christ is just the beginning!  We can find this truth paralleled in the story of a little girl who went upstairs to bed. A short time later, her father heard a thud as she fell out of bed and began to cry.  He went to comfort her and she said, “I must have fallen asleep too close to where I got in.”  

      I believe this is the case for many Christians.  They make a decision for Christ and then fall asleep, without knowing how or even being unwilling to submit and go on the journey with God.  Revelation 3 tells us how this makes God feel. The book of Revelation records the following to the people in Laodicea.

Revelation 3:14-22  To the angel of the church in Laodicea writes:

These are the words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the ruler of God’s creation.  I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other!  So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth.  You say, ‘I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing.’ But you do not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked.  I counsel you to buy from me gold refined in the fire, so you can become rich, and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness, and salve to put on your eyes, so you can see.

 Those whom I love I rebuke and discipline. So be earnest and repent.  Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.

 To the one who is victorious, I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I was victorious and sat down with my Father on his throne.  Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches.

     Again, knowing Christ is not a one-time decision but rather a lifelong journey.  A journey that changes us day by day to be more like Him. In other words, a Christian gets up in the morning and says, “God, I have been sleeping, but you haven’t.  Show me where you will be working today and show me how to be a part of it. I want to be there with You. Use me, God.”  

     You might ask, what does that look like?  One way that Kim and I put this into practice is looking for what we call “God appointments”.   Just this week, Kim and I went to a restaurant with our sons Ben and Silas and daughter-in-law Grace.  Our waitress was very sincere and caring. I felt the need to get to know her and ask her some questions.  I probably would not have done this if I had not gotten up that morning and asked God to use me, to show me that appointment.  We found out that she had had to take some time off of work, which put her behind in her finances. In the middle of the meal, I tipped her $50.00, and by the time the meal was done, we all chipped in more and she had a total of $250.00  in tips. She hugged us all and cried. I gently and lovingly told her that we were Christians and that God wanted us to do this for her. I was so proud of our boys and Grace for saying they wanted to be a part of it too. If you are a parent, this is how you teach your children to be looking for God appointments and follow through.  I wasn’t surprised when they all said that this was the high point of their week. This is what it is like to be looking for God appointments and then be fulfilled when they happen.

     A Christian is an imitator of Christ.  God’s Spirit takes up residence within us and our faith will give us “feet” to walk with Him.   Our very character will become the character of God… and this character is what is needed to truly be “one flesh” in marriage.  This is not to say we will be perfect.  Believe me, I have looked in the mirror and perfection is not in my immediate future.  This is not to say we will not still have a sinful nature and sometimes make a wrong choice.  This does mean that the bad choice will not deter us from getting back on the right track again.

     I am an ardent student of watching and reading people.  For 30 plus years I have counseled and studied people. One thing I have seen over and over again is people viewing their faith as a community rather than as a personal relationship. The mistake here is looking to other Christians to see how to model the Christian life, rather than looking to Christ Himself.  The fact is, to many people being a Christian is going to a church building, greeting others, getting pumped up a bit about God, and then going home to their normal routine.  

     It is a good thing to go to church and meet with other believers and to be encouraged in your faith; and it is great to have a Christian friend or mentor who points you to Christ, but they are not Jesus.  They can point you to Him, but they are not Him. I have found in my years of Christian counseling that there have been too many occasions where Christians gave their friends advice that was not Biblical. Hopefully, our Christian friends will point us to God’s will, but they have a human component and they are not the Holy Spirit.  There is simply no substitute for being plugged into God.  

     If the church has become a social club where you go to get a shot of Jesus for the week and come back next week needing another shot, I believe that you are missing the mark.  We meet with other Christians for encouragement and support, but the relationship is meant to be with Christ. In other words, the church is not where you get your fulfillment, but Jesus is.  The church is just the icing on the cake, so to speak.  

    Think about this and how it relates to you personally.  Maybe you are not yet where you need to be with Christ and you need to get your priorities straight.  If you do not already attend a good Bible-believing church, go to one. Go to a Bible-believing pastor or Christian friend and get this relationship with God in place so that you are on the path of knowing God and listening to His direction.  

     One of the biggest lies Satan tells all of us is that we are not good enough to be Christians.  He is partly right – none of us are. But what he leaves out is that because of the loving sacrifice of Christ, we are welcomed anyway, sin and all.  Once we get our relationship with Christ right, we are ready to become one flesh. In other words, if your relationship with Christ is not where it should be, you are not ready to be married.  

      We had a young couple come to church.  They had their professions nailed down, a good home and they were thinking of starting a family.  They wanted to bring their child into the best possible home so they decided to come to church and look into the Christian faith before they had children.  They each made a personal decision for Christ and were baptized. They did it for their future kids but it also transformed their marriage. By the way, one year after their first Sunday at church their first son was born.  I was glad they had sought out God so they could bring their son into a Christian home.  

     Having a relationship with Christ and seeking to become more like Him every day has transformed our marriage.  He can transform your marriage too! To learn more, check out our companion blog on “How to Have an Unfair Advantage in Your Marriage”.  I hope to get it out in the next week or so.

To learn more, check out our companion blog post on “How to Have an Unfair Advantage in Your Marriage”